Anyone awake for cards?

Erratic sleep patterns. Not fun. Not my thrill. But it's the deal. Sometimes I may sleep eight to nine hours in a slumber that nothing could wake me from. Other times it as if I I awaken every hour if not more and there is no real sleep. Up this morning early after just a few hours of tossing and turning the night away. Been awake a while now and back to bed several times but I have given up the futile endeavor. For now. So the coffee is warming in the microwave. Finally. Well, the water is anyway,for instant coffee...

Screw the world and all it contains! Coffee is making!

Just had to get that said. Better now. You know, I'd rather have erotic sleep patterns than erratic but I suppose it is not in the cards. Then I could feel ecstatic rather than eroded. But not in the cards. So what is in the cards? Hmmmm, I dunno. Been told I am a card player before. Told that by my best friend long ago. He felt I held out. Always had a card to play if need be. I am not sure how true that is anymore. Seems some cards have been creeping up to the table in modern times.

Some people consider life a game. My best friend does come to think of it. The problem I have with the analogy however is that it implies that life is manipulative. Is it? Are we here to manipulate all we come in contact with? I just can't buy that. Don't think I can. The thought occurred to me to broaden the concept of manipulation so as to possibly understand this "game of life". But no matter how we look at "manipulation" how can we possibly escape the inherent ulterior motive(s) attached? What do we do with that random act of kindness towards a stranger generated by a truly loving person? The person of such character that he would even risk his life to save anothers if need be. If life is a game it has some funny rules.

Sometimes I wonder if I get off on these tangents of philosophical escapades to avoid getting personal. After all it is easier for me to wax philosophical than to open myself up. Even blogging. This is suppose to be an exercise of honest expression through blogging my thoughts, whatever they might be. And it has been so far. But the thoughts tend to avoid the personal at times. I am acutely aware at times that this is no private diary. No sirree bob. This is a blog in a public forum. I don't know who reads it other than just a few friends I have made aware. So maybe some cards are held in reserve. Maybe eventually they will get played. Maybe, maybe not. Maybe life is a game.