For the first time in my life God became real to me. I was seventeen. I had become increasingly more and more open minded at Church and listened intently. And was doing so in a non-altered state of mind. One night after work at the local grocery store I stopped by to see a "straight friend". I knew few of those anymore but that was all I had. He was not home. What happened that night at my friend who has not home's house was astounding. I will never forget that Monday night, October 15, 1974. That night God became real to me. My friend was not home but his father was. Craig's father was a good man, a godly man. One unassuming and a heart of gold. That night we talked and talked. We studied the Bible together. I listened intently. I wanted what he was talking about. I wanted what I heard folks at church talk about. I wanted to be saved. Most importantly I wanted God to be real in my life. So it happened. That night I went home with a head still wet from full baptismal immersion. My mom cried when I told her why my hair was wet. Dad smiled. A new beginning. I felt an inner peace that was deep and pure. What an incredible feeling. A new beginning.
Up and down the halls of high school I toted my Bible in hand along with my other books. I was ready to convert the world. At study hall every day I read for an hour occasionally noticing an odd look on someones face when I looked up. Prayer became part of that hour as well. In that daily hour I escaped from the high school world around me into another world, that of God and spirituality. A deep reprieve it was. It was an experience of feeling very close to God. It was a spiritual high now, not chemical. Every night I studied the Bible and prayed. It became an exciting new path in life. The knowledge of God was endless it seemed. So I walked the path seeking that knowledge. I became a seeker of truth. It was a rocky path as I still had volatile emotions. I had been a moody ass all my life. Drugs provided a nice little escape from that. So did the occasional alcohol. But now I was using God to provide that escape. Problem was sometimes my emotions or my state of spiritual being seemed still a mess. And a mess it seemed no matter how much I prayed or how much I studied. I became involved in the church but I was still dying inside sometimes.
After I few months I picked up the again along with an occasional beer or three. This time I did not go to church stoned, well most of the time I didn't...lol. Life became a vacillation between altered states of mind unnaturally induced and a sincere search for a higher spirituality. To say it was a struggle does not describe it. Entering college I entered a clean period of my life. No drugs, alcohol, nothing for the first few years(until I got engaged to be married...lol). I entered college not knowing what to do with my life. I had idealistic notions of becoming a preacher or a missionary. Not knowing what I was going to do I took a lot of Bible hours since I enjoyed them. Some were required anyway. I just took more than required. My freshman year Cheryl broke my heart. She waited until after I took her to see John Denver to do so. How kind it was of her to do so. That same year I met someone I would date for two years and then marry my junior year. Her father had been a missionary in the Philippines when she was a little girl. I decided to get a degree in Bible as I had so many hours anyway. I also went after a degree in Accounting just in case. Just in case the preacher/missionary aspirations got flushed away. They did. I started smoking dope secretly without my wife knowing the first year of our marriage.
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